Of lost time and a grumpy nine months.....

Wow! To say it's been a while would be an understatement. This was a 'while' while. A whole nine months of a while. Don't ask me where I was; don't bother with the ‘why’s’. It's like these past months have been a whirlwind ride and I don't really remember much of anything. Last I recall, I'd been planning to bring out a post on procrastination. Never really got to that, oddly enough. 

*laughs* See what I did there?

So, what brings me back, you ask? Well, the other day, we'd been discussing the past year and a buddy asks me what the one thing I missed the most was. You'd think just because I'm mentioning this right now, I'd had said it was this blog, but no, not really. Normally my answer would be related to past friendships and old jokes, but for the first time in my life, I actually thought before opening my yap and surprisingly, in the rusty cobwebbed corner of my cranium, I heard a quiet whisper that echoed past unused hallways, resonating louder with every beat, a single word, ‘Purpose’.

Before I explain further; Yes, I did in fact call my brain unused; No, I'm not stupid; No, I admit to nothing.

Anyways, that conversation with my friend made me realize something. In the past eleven months since this year has begun, I've done absolutely nothing worth remembering. Father Time seems to be in such a rush these days that I don't know when one month ends and the other begins. That wretched old man with the shabby cloak is giving me whiplash with his sudden days and nights that I'd like to just grab him by his wispy beard and shove him head first into an elephant's rear end. Maybe a trip to where the sun don't shine might just make him see the light. *snickers*

Sorry, bad joke! Bad joke!

But we need time, dammit! 

And its not just the clock. I don't remember when last I've had the drive or purpose to do anything. It used to be that I'd write this blog for a reason, but all the humdrum of day to day life has snapped the urge right out of me. It pains me to know that I've whittled away nine months of my life without anything productive. This! While all around me, every second of everyday someone out there is blogging just to make sense of all that he or she is. It's disheartening.

Oh my God! I just realized something. If those last two lines were written in context to childbirth, this post would have a whole new meaning.

Holy Macaroni! This is why I love words! *snickers*

See? This was what I was missing!  For those of you out there who just can't find the time to do what you love, don't give up on it. Just don't! Take it from someone who wasted nine months, *snickers*, I'm sorry but that just gets me,*snickers*, sorry,*laughs*

The point is, just try! You can readjust your schedule, sleep less, or you could just scrunch up your schedule into a ball and shove it down Father Time's throat but whatever you do, keep writing, always keep writing!

And don't drink, and don't smoke, and don't watch porn, and don't kick beavers. Seriously, Don't! I'll haunt you in your dreams if you hurt those furry bastards. Not cool man! Not cool!

Pussies, Pussies everywhere...

What did Alexander, Napoleon, and Genghis Khan, all have in common? One hell of a death wish. Either that or they were dropped on the head when they were babies. I've heard stuff like that can really screw someone up. Just ask me! My dad still curses the day someone left a banana peel lying around the house. His son has never been the same since (and I've got the bump to prove it.). But they were brave, or whatever that means. Frankly, facing an army of soldiers that would like nothing better than to send a barbed stake up your ass isn't really at the top of my wish list.

I've never been an adrenaline junkie. Never understood why one would rather run towards danger. Perhaps that makes me a lesser man but I kind of like having my bones facing the right way.

For so long, I've beaten myself up over the fact that I don't have the 'guts' to take life by the collar. It sucks knowing you're a pussy and you can't do much about it. Who wouldn't want to do a Bruce Willis every other day? (Yes! Die Hard 5 is awesome! Critics be damned.)  The idea of facing my fears seems so foreign in every way, that it rarely surprises me every time I flinch at something.For so long, I've pictured myself as the Cowardly Lion from the 'Wizard of Oz', always in search of that extra vial of courage. Maybe then I'd be able to beat up the bullies and jump over buildings. Perhaps then I'd have a huge penis and all the girls would lov...

Perhaps I got carried away a little. But isn't that how life goes. How society worships the brave. The ones that have no fear are revered, immortalised.

But do such people really exist? Is there really any such thing as 'no fear'?

Everyone is afraid. It's all part of being human. I used to think I was a pussy. I still do! But I'm not worried anymore. My time will come. Perhaps one day I'll find that vial of courage. Because really, isn't that vial just a drop of purpose? All the great heroes of the past have faced their fears because they had to. For love, for honour, for respect, perhaps even self preservation. In the end of it all, it matters only that you've got the drive. Courage isn't really measured in the steps taken forward but the will to take back what truly matters the most. We all have that in us and I pray one day we shall find that thing worth fighting for.

Perhaps then, we can all be brave. Until then, Running does have a really nice ring to it, doesn't it?

An Epiphany

Don't you just love epiphanies. I do! They always hit me when I least expect it. Wether I'm jumping over a fence or just staring at Scarlet Johanssen's.......smile.

Aaah. Good times.

*sighs*

Where was I? Aah yes, My epiphany. This struck me a few days back.

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Of the most worn out of terms, none is more used than the word 'cool'. It is society's greatest irony that everyone, this writer included, attempts to bring a little cool factor to their image. And in attempting to do so, in trying to be the 'smooth cool dude around the block', we tend to overlook a little something. You see, chances are, you may succeed, you could very well be considered as such, but let's try to glimpse at what's actually happening here.

It goes without saying that the word 'cool' is just a slang for 'unfazed'. See where I'm going here? How can one consider himself as 'cool' when he's so fazed by what society thinks of him. To be truly 'cool' is to stick by one's true identity. Not follow some fucked up trend the world seems hell bent on drooling over.

Because let's face it, more often than not, glazed eyes and a hoodie are just going to make you look like a junkie. 

There's never going to be a perfect recipe. 

Except maybe for Tom Cruise.

('Kay I'll come clean! I've had this huge man crush on the guy ever since, well, ever. Yes, my unmentionables are intact! No, I'm NOT sprouting ovaries. Shut up, He's awesome. DO. NOT. CALL. HIM. OLD. )

(And the couch thing was kinda cute. Shut up, I'm not gay!)

The point is, just be yourself. You'll do fine. If they love you, awesome. If they find you annoying, then, well, it isn't worth thinking twice over. I've had loads of people look me in the eye thinking I belong in an institution. Perhaps I do. Perhaps I don't. You know what, I kinda look forward to those looks, just so I can quote one of my favourite literary figures.

"Don't worry, buddy. I'm an acquired taste. Most of my best friends had to know me for years before they could even stand my presence. I'm like mold, I usually grow on you very slowly." -Tabitha Deveraux

And on that awesome note- Sayonara (Did you know this was chinese? I always thought it was spanish.)

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Writer's notes : Sayonara is actually japaneese. Apparently my readers are smart. Thanks for the correction guys. Let's not mention this ever again. No seriously. Never again. Or I will find you and I'll make you watch barbie re-runs all day. If that doesn't kill you, I don't know what will?
 

Small can work just as fine...

The subtle ticking of seconds gone by filled the quiet stillness of anticipation. All breathing was paused until that feeble arm of father time reached that still infernal spot which would perhaps, as it has so often in the past, signal the start of a new day. Or perhaps…the end of time itself. Who am I kidding, that ship sailed by a long time ago. 

Tick.

Tick.

Tick.

3 more seconds.

Tick.

Tick.

And so it began.

On this most momentous of occasions, I’d like to pay homage to the greatest invention ever made. 

No, I don’t mean the back scratcher. Yes, I know how awesome it is…Yes…I...

No, Victoria Secrets has nothing to do with it. Nope. Not even Apple. I said NO!

What I was saying was, the greatest of all inventions has to be, the diminutive ‘Cog Wheel’. 

Yeah, save the groans until after you hear me out

.

The Cog is the symbol of all things ‘change’. Da Vinci in a moment of greatness might’ve uncovered a device that would change the face of the earth in the years to come. For in the spiked wheel, one does not just come across a vital of piece of everyday circuitry but something quite extraordinary.

For in considering the cog, we look at an image of change. Its sequential rotations bring about perennial motions that have the ability to fire a change of immense consequences. It shows of how huge clockwork devices weighing tons are fired by the smallest of cogs. 

Taking this into everyday life, it’s amazing how a miracles can be created by the teensiest of actions.

Just as how the greatest waves start with the smallest of ripples.

How the greatest books start with the smallest of words.

How the greatest orgasms start with the smallest of.......Ok-aaaaay, didn’t really know where I was going with that.

It should then be considered that in the year to come, what we willingly or unwillingly do has the ability to effect the lives of those around us. A small scowl or uncalled-for comment has the power to bring down a person’s will while something as small as a smile has the potential to lift a heart, and that is as priceless a feeling as one can possibly feel. 

It’s quite worth the thought, is it not? 

Stop a single cog and father time himself comes to his knees. Just imagine what a small deed done with the best of intentions could do? 

Maybe it couldn’t give us world peace but an answering smile is, quite frankly, just as beautiful.

HAPPY NEW YEAR GUYS! Thanks for reading ^_^